Able seamen

A while back I was amazed to see that a landlocked country such as Switzerland could win the elite world sailing race. Alinghi, a Swiss boat won the Americas Cup and I figured if they could do it, then Ireland, an island nation, should have no problems winning the thing.

I threw down the gauntlet then and challenged them with an Irish boat called Dinghi, fitted out with a jacuzzi, shag pile carpets and plenty of cup holders. It seems they’ve taken up the challenge:

America’s Cup postponed over row

The story claims it’s all about politics and race regulations but I have the insider track. Alinghi are not allowed the shag carpets and they’re throwing a tantrum. We have them on the ropes already!

Now all I need to do is plumb in the jacuzzi and get a crew on board and we’ll show the Swiss how to win a yacht race! 

Should I be worried?

Got this from my Mum today via email:

Beatrice.

 

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.

 

As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a  condom! 

 

When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. 

 

“Miss Beatrice”, he said, “I wonder if you would tell me about this”pointing to the bowl.”Oh,  yes,” she replied, “Isn’t it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. 

 

The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven’t had the flu all winter.”  

 

A little side project

You may have noticed a little addition on the right of the page. The Daily Male is a new blog set up by 73man who has kindly invited people to contribute. So I joined up and will now do most of my venting there I think and the Swiss Job can get back to what it was created for in the first place, i.e. Switzerland and everything Swiss.

So pop across to the Daily Male and subscribe to it. Better yet, drop him an email and join in the fun. You know you want to!

Ps. The Daily Male is an equal opportunities blog and encourages applications from men, women and any combination thereof. 

Mot du jour…

I know, it’s an easy post, but I’m up against it at the moment. Here’s today’s top word:

stekelvarken - porcupine (in Dutch)

Closely followed in second place by:

schnupfen - cold/runny nose/sneezing without the wheezing! (in German)

So if you come across a dual-nationality, bilingual porcupine breeder with a poorly animal, you’ll have the necessary lingo to get by.

Don’t say I’ve never helped!

I so want to do this…

A while back I mentioned I wanted to be an astronaut. Here’s why:

How to get rid of rubbish in space

How much fun would that be?