I’ve been de-flowered.
My IKEA cherry was well and truly lost last Friday night. And boy was it good. The first time is always the best supposedly but when I think of all the flat-packed goodness in that store I can’t wait for my next time. Sit back, relax and let me tell you about our IKEA voyage…
1. A bed (preferably big and comfy)
2. A wardrobe (preferably big with funky drawers)
3. A couch (preferably big – you may be detecting a theme here – with room to stretch out)
4. Shelves (for the spare bedroom)
5. A set of drawers (does exactly what it says on the tin)
6. A table and chairs (possibly, we want something not so new and flat packed)
Armed with our list and a strict budget we hit the store. I quickly realised that IKEA functions in some sort of time-warp/blackhole kinda thing. We went in one end of the store and arrived out at the same end but we walked for miles in between. And time went at least three times quicker than outside. Stephen Hawkings needn’t look any further. “A brief history of time” should have been set in an IKEA store.
Everybody do the time warp! I couldn’t make head nor tail of it. All I know is that it’s a lot further than it looks on the map!
Anyway, the first thing to tick off the list was the couch. We didn’t just get a couch, we got a green one! At the time it was an exciting, statement making, caution to the wind decision. On reflection there are worries (Eva’s worried!) about colour schemes and things that “go” with it.
This is Eva trying out the green couch and the price tag!
Next up was the wardrobe which was pretty straight forward, ditto for the bed and shelves and we decided against a table and chairs for the time being. Our only impulse buys were a big chunky wooden chopping block and a washing up brush with a suction cup on the end so you can stick it to the worktop. Not bad you have to admit. Especially for a first-timer like me.
So the last few evenings have been spent constructing furniture. Lots of furniture. As we generally don’t get home till after six and we have to have dinner and things we are tight for time before the “noise making curfue” kicks in at 10pm. And as we’re trying to be nice to our new neighbours we’ve been keeping the noise to a minimum. We’ve now perfected the art of building IKEA without making a sound.
I see it as a new martial art. Silent IKEA or “SIKEA” as I like to call it.
We’re IKEA ninjas in a way. Armed with a hammer and screw-driver we can build a shelf unit in complete silence and you’ll never know we’d been there. You’re impressed, I can tell.