As slick as a snakeoil salesman…

I love these sayings.

Similes I believe they’re called. It all stems from my time in college. I had two friends in class called Jimmy “The Pav” and Ben “Bata Fada” (long stories behind each nickname!). Both men had legendary sayings that could be used at any occasion without warning. We always threatened to write them down but never got round to it.

The classics contained gems such as:

“I’m so hungry I could eat the rear end of a low flying duck”

He’s as camp as a row of tents

Of course most of the lines were mostly used to describe women and to emphasise a feeling at the time! I’ll spare you the nasty ones but lets just say, there were many times when we had to stop what we were doing just to laugh.

I’ve now discovered that Google allows you to search for these saying. As with everything else in life Google seems to have it covered and this really made my day. I got to read through a few of the old ones and discovered a load of new ones.

Here’s how you do it:

Type “I was as slick/hungry/tired (or whatever else) as…” into Google and enjoy! Make sure to include the quotation marks and three full stops. Hours of fun and a few witty lines for when you want to impress someone!

My favourite at the moment:

I was sweating like a … sumo in a sauna”

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